【分有】读书与翻书

 

养生学问里，专家们推荐给中老年人饮食建议中有种吃法可简称为“羊吃草法”，意思就是少吃多餐。最初听见这说法时，我脑子里的那个画面非常海拉尔，非常呼和浩特，非常天苍苍野茫茫风吹草低见牛羊……东一嘴，西一嘴，南一口，北一口，我的嘴在那个画面里变成羊嘴，轻轻蠕动，野草清新气息随之扑面而来。

养生学家所说“少吃多餐”在我听见它的那个年纪完全鸡对鸭讲。某日，当这个“羊吃草”建议在我记忆存盘里发出微弱回声那个瞬间，我觉得所谓“羊吃草”进餐法，正好是对我读书习惯的一种比喻：不是正襟危坐而是相反，不是沐浴焚香而是相反，不是一气呵成而是相反。我就是这么读书的……不对，不是读书，是翻书。

在汉语口语表达习惯里，“读”书或“翻”书大致算近义词，意思挨得非常近。可仔细推推敲敲，细徵差别也还有。“读”书带有庄重、正式乃至煞有介事意味，“翻”书却随意、随性，乃至随便。我曾反复测试过读翻之别，至少在我，与其说我确曾读过点儿书，不如说我确曾翻过点儿书。

好久以前，曾采访《读书》杂志前任主编沈昌文先生。整个采访过程围绕读书、《读书》杂志展开。言谈中，沈师聊得最起劲儿的，也是读书。采访中，我第一次得知《读书》杂志的一个口号：“你可以不读书，但不可以不读《读书》”……没想到，采访临结束，沈师忽然小声嘀咕：“其实，我最想编的不是《读书》，”“那你喜欢编什么？”“我最想编的那本杂志啊，是，《翻书》”。

这当然是沈师玩笑话。不过，这玩笑后来被我过度阐释为我自己不求甚解好高骛远翻书成瘾的一整套理论。顺着沈师玩笑，我甚至回忆起念书时郭预衡师的一段妙论：在回答中文系学生永远看不完各科老师开列的成千上万必读书疑问时，郭师说：全读当然办不到，可念书时，全翻一遍，他自己真正做到了……这就好比别人给你介绍美女，坐在屋子里看美女简历与亲赴陶然亭紫竹院相亲聊聊天扯扯淡见一面，其别霄壤。

沈师郭师无意之谈被我误读式吸收。我曾把染满报纸油墨的黑手认真洗完三遍，然后再去阅读当年由作家出版社出版、用上好稀罕蒙肯纸印制阿城师大作《常识与通识》，可那种端庄起来的读与此后我歪腻在枕头上的翻完全不同。端庄里的阿城忽然就有了严师之范，而歪窝在沙发里翻阅的阿城依旧亲切平和，像一位老友。

我发现，拼死拼活忙完一礼拜，周末繁杂琐事之外，我最惬意的时光就是羊吃草式瞎翻。坐在那张吱吱扭扭响个不停的转椅上，随手从书架随便抽出一本书，随意翻到一页随意一目十行……这种翻书有时还真看进去了，还真看懂了作者深意，并顺手重温我从前在书页空白处所留肤浅眉批幼齿慨叹，可有时，这种翻书不过是在搭乘开回往昔的那趟地铁。

我翻出过不少夹在书里的购书小票，它们总会让我回忆起我与某本书生成缘分那一刹的心慌或得意；我翻出过不少夹在书里的碎纸片，旧报纸一角，乃至某本日记里撕下的一个单张儿，上面或写着一个不知何方的电话，或写着一些不着四六的闲言……它们努力帮助我回忆我，努力帮助我否定我嘲笑我记忆我赞美我，好像我现在已就是一个失忆人。

翻书之妙尽在这无穷无尽走神儿之中。重温读过的书，检索遗漏的书，粗览新到手的书之类当然就是“翻书”重要内容，可有时，那绝对偶然翻到的一章或一句，会忽然笼罩我前前后后一生。人生太短了，想偶遇更多睿智，翻比读在更贪婪更饕餮的同时，也更划算。这样的翻且不说值回书价，简直就是值回老命……这是我的翻书之秘。我也是写着写着，才，想到的。

翻来翻去，涂涂抹抹，我喜欢在书页天头地脚写字。年月日之外，我发现，大致遵循不动笔墨不看书的我翻书时写的得最多的一个短语是：“我在这里”。现在看，这个类似“王二到此一游”的习惯性留言标明了我对时间的无助与恐慌，所以我要不断用这4个字提示精神遛弯儿心智漫游的真实与确切。不过，反着想，它也是我逃离万千既定秩序的一种低成本努力：我不断告诫自己“×年×月×日我在这里我-在-这-里”的同时，也是在说，我不在那里。真的，我-不-在-那-里。

转载于：黄集伟的blog http://blog.huangjiwei.com/?p=4849

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